The Real Slim Shady - Eminem Lyric


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00:00:00
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00:00:02
May I have your attention, please?
May I have your attention, please?

00:00:08
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please
stand up?

00:00:17
We're gonna have a problem here...

00:00:18
Y'all act like you never seen a white
person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam like Tommy
just burst in the door

00:00:23
And started whoopin' her ass worse than
before
They first were divorced, suin' her over
furniture (Agh!)

00:00:27
It's the return of the "Ah, wait, no way,
you're kidding
He didn't just say what I think he did,
did he?"

00:00:32
And Dr. Dre said… nothing, you idiots!
Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my
basement (ha ha!)

00:00:37
Feminist women love Eminem
"Chicka, chicka, chicka, Slim Shady, I'm
sick of him

00:00:41
Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his
you-know-what
Flippin' the you-know-who," "Yeah, but
he's so cute though."

00:00:46
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws
up in my head loose
But no worse than what's goin' on in your
parents' bedrooms

00:00:51
Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let
loose
But can't, but it's cool for Tom Green to
hump a dead moose

00:00:55
"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on
your lips"
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it
a little kiss

00:00:59
And that's the message that we deliver to
little kids
And expect them not to know what a
woman's clitoris is

00:01:04
Of course, they're gonna know what
intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They've got the Discovery Channel, don't
they?

00:01:09
We ain't nothin' but mammals—well, some
of us, cannibals
Who cut other people open like
cantaloupes

00:01:14
But if we can hump dead animals and
antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man and
another man can't elope

00:01:18
But if you feel like I feel, I got the
antidote
Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the
chorus, and it goes—

00:01:23
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating

00:01:27
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand
up
Please stand up, please stand up?

00:01:32
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real
Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating

00:01:36
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand
up
Please stand up, please stand up?

00:01:41
Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps
to sell records (Nope)
Well, I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!

00:01:45
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me,
let alone stand me

00:01:50
"But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it
be weird?"
Why, so you guys could just lie to get me
here?

00:01:54
So you can sit me here next to Britney
Spears?
Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me
chairs

00:01:59
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred
Durst
And hear 'em argue over who she gave head
to first

00:02:04
Little bitch put me on blast on MTV
"Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's
married to Kim, hee-hee."

00:02:08
I should download her audio in MP3
And show the whole world how you gave
Eminem VD (Agh!)

00:02:13
I'm sick of you little girl and boy
groups
All you do is annoy me, so I have been
sent here to destroy you

00:02:18
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me, who just don't give a
fuck like me

00:02:22
Who dress like me; walk, talk and act
like me
And just might be the next best thing,
but not quite me

00:02:27
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real
Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating

00:02:31
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand
up
Please stand up, please stand up?

00:02:36
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real
Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating

00:02:40
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand
up
Please stand up, please stand up?

00:02:45
I'm like a head trip to listen to,
‘cause I'm only givin' you
Things you joke about with your friends
inside your livin' room

00:02:50
The only difference is I got the balls to
say it in front of y'all
And I don't gotta be false or sugarcoat
it at all

00:02:55
I just get on the mic and spit it
And whether you like to admit it, I just
shit it

00:02:59
Better than 90% of you rappers out can
Then you wonder: "How can
Kids eat up these albums like Valiums?"

00:03:03
It's funny, ‘cause at the rate, I'm
going, when I'm 30
I'll be the only person in the nursing
home flirting

00:03:08
Pinching nurse's asses when I'm jacking
off with Jergens
And I'm jerking, but this whole bag of
Viagra isn't working

00:03:13
And every single person is a Slim Shady
lurking
He could be working at Burger King,
spittin' on your onion rings

00:03:18
Or in the parking lot, circling,
screaming, "I don't give a fuck!"
With his windows down and his system up

00:03:22
So will the real Shady please stand up
And put one of those fingers on each hand
up?

00:03:26
And be proud to be outta your mind and
outta control
And one more time, loud as you can, how
does it go?

00:03:31
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating

00:03:35
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand
up
Please stand up, please stand up?

00:03:40
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real
Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating

00:03:44
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand
up
Please stand up, please stand up?

00:03:49
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real
Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating

00:03:54
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand
up
Please stand up, please stand up?

00:03:58
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real
Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating

00:04:03
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand
up
Please stand up, please stand up?

00:04:08
Ha ha, I guess there’s a Slim Shady in
all of us

00:04:15
Let’s all stand up!

Top Ranking
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"But I'm only going to get this one

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2
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I can swallow a bottle of alcohol and

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3
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(Yo, wait up!)

I got a song filled with shit for the

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4
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Look, if you had one shot, or one

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